When you are single, you see happily married couples everywhere! When you are married, you find happy singles everywhere! Marriages are tricky and complicated. It's an awesome feeling if everything goes well. If not, you have to live with that one annoying person for years unless you are willing to deal with all the personal and financial mess, a divorce brings with it. So, how can one make sure their marriage lasts for eternity? Well, it's quite easy! Make every day of your married life as beautiful and memorable as you can. Don't ever allow a third person to come in between you and your partner and most importantly, make sure every day you make your partner smile and laugh. And to help you with that, Here are fifteen hilarious husband and wife jokes that will make you laugh irrespective of your marital status.
A man goes to a doctor. He says, "Hey doctor, I think my wife's going deaf." The doctor replies, "Here's something you can try to tell if she's really going deaf. Stand a few steps away from your wife and ask her some question. Walk a few steps close to her until she responds. You remember the distance and come back to me."
The man goes home. He says, "Honey, what's for dinner?"
He doesn't hear an answer, so he slowly walks closer toward her.
"Honey, what's for dinner?" He asks.
He doesn't get any response.
He moves a little further, and asks her, "Hey, honey, what's for dinner?"
She replies, "Jesus, for the eleventh time, I said we are having meatloaf for dinner!!!"
2.A Sad Husband!
Once, a man walked into a bar. He looked very sad and depressed. The bartender asked the man what he wants, to which the man replied, "A beer." The bartender asked him why he was sad that day. The man said, "I got into a fight with my wife. She said she will not talk to me for a month." The bartender said, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I hope she talks to you very soon."
The man replied, "Well, the one month is up tonight. She will be speaking with me from tomorrow."
A man approached a beautiful woman at a supermarket. He said, "Hey, can you speak with me for five minutes. The woman simply asked, "Why?" The man replied, "I have lost my wife here in the supermarket. Every time I speak to a beautiful woman she appears out of nowhere!"