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How To Overcome Shyness

Tuesday, Jul 5, 2022, 6:52 pm


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1.Learn Go-To Stories

Go-to stories are the stories you tell when asked what you do or about your past. Instead of a one word answer, saying that you are a hairdresser, talk about what you do with a story that you already have pre-rehearsed. Or have a few little interesting stories to tell from your past that you already have laid out in your head.




2.Learn Common Responses

Learn common responses and reactionary phrases. It will make you feel more comfortable in communication when you know what to say, instead of just saying, "really?" Watch what others say, learn the words, have them ready for whenever you are in a conversation. Being comfortable in the art of conversation will eliminate shyness.



3.Challenge Yourself

Challenge yourself. Nothing good ever came of playing it safe. Put yourself in uncomfortable situations and challenge yourself to stay in them for as long as possible. Even if you start out with just fifteen minutes, add more and more time until you can stay an hour, then two hours, and more.





4.Put The Focus On Others

Turn the focus on others if the focus on you feels uncomfortable. Praise someone, or ask questions. When you turn the limelight on them, they are not focused on you and you can breathe a sigh of relief, regain composure, and be seen as someone who is genuinely interested in others.



5.Smile More

Smile more. Shy people tend to look scared all the time, or sad. If you have nothing to contribute to a conversation, or are afraid to speak, a warm smile goes a long way. Now, you don't want a jack-o-lantern smile that is going to scare everyone, just a warm and inviting smile that shows you are engaged in the conversation.





6.Look Straight Ahead

Lift your head, so that your eyes are not looking up. People who are shy tend to hang their heads forward, so that their eyes are looking up when they want to look straight. Lift your head up. It shows confidence and puts you on the same playing field with everyone else.



7.Ask Questions During Awkward Silences

If awkward silences make you uncomfortable, have a set of questions ready to ask. Simple questions that can apply to anyone. Most people love to be asked about themselves, and love even more to talk about themselves. Questions about where they are from, or what they do for a living, are great.




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8.Learn That It's Okay To Be Different

Accepting that it's okay to be different will help you to overcome your shyness. Just because you wear your hair a certain way, like certain clothes or shoes, are interested in an obscure topic, or like different music, doesn't mean you have to be insecure about it. In fact, it's just the opposite. You are unique.



9.Find Your Strengths

Find your strengths and play up on them. Are you well versed in politics, or do you know everything there is to know about the mothers on Dance Moms? Do you sing really well, play the piano, walk on your hands? Nothing is off limits. Find your strengths and use them to shine.



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10.Realize Not Everyone Is Judging You

It is important to realize that not everyone is judging you. Shy people tend to think that everyone is going to notice their shortcoming, but the truth is that most people are too concerned with themselves to notice. Everyone has their own set of insecurities to deal with and yours go unnoticed.



11.Learn What Makes You Most Shy

Figure out what it is that makes you the most shy. Do you feel insecure about your looks, your intelligence, your wit? Is it social situations that cause you stress because you are afraid you don't have anything to talk about? Identifying what its that causes your shyness is the route to overcoming it.




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12.Learn To Like Yourself

The first step in overcoming shyness is the act of learning to like yourself. How can you expect anyone to like you if you don't like yourself. Look at all your great qualities, everyone has them. Physical features, inner beauty, and talents are all things to examine and learn to love.



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