Stupidest Warning Labels

Friday, Aug 28, 2020, 3:57 pm

By:Tony Williams

1.How to Hold a Baby

The person who created this warning label should be picked up like the baby in the second photo. If you don't know how to hold a baby properly, then you should probably keep your distance. Even monkeys don't hold their babies like the person is doing in the second photo.

2.Nuts Contain Nuts

I'm 99% sure that if someone goes into a store and buys a canister of nuts, they know what they're getting themselves into. The 'winners' that create these roasted peanuts felt the need to warn users that the nut canister contains nuts. The person that wrote this label is obviously a Harvard scholar.

3.Fined For death

Always remember that just because you're dead, it doesn't mean you're debt-free. This Tramway was nice enough to tell people not to touch the wires unless they want to be fried to a crisp. The sign goes on to say that they will be fined. Not sure how you fine a dead person, but hey let's just go with it.

4.Spray Not for Breast Enhancement

This spray is for fixing flat tires. Even though women who aren't blessed with big breasts are called flat-chested, common sense should tell any woman that there is no way a spray can enlarge your breasts. Not to mention, where exactly would the nozzle be inserted to fill the breasts with air?

5.Wear Your Hat on your Head

Hats shouldn't come with warning labels, but this one does. The label is in Spanish, but the images show a very clear image. Only a buffoon would wear a hat on their butt or step on it. If you spend your days stepping or sitting on hats, then you need to get a hobby quick!

6.Don't Wash your Children

Kids do get dirty throughout the day, but a warm bath or hot shower should fix that in a jiffy. Some lame person probably attempted to wash their child in a washing machine, thereby leading to the creation of this bizarre warning label. This label should also mention, and include, small pets.

7.No Screwdrivers in penis

People like to experiment with their body, but this is just too weird to even believe or imagine. The warning label on this pack of screwdrivers tells men that these tools are not to be inserted in their penis. Just thinking about a man attempting something so off-the-wall makes you cringe.

8.No Eating You iPod

You have to be either really hungry or very deranged if you think eating an iPod is okay. For some odd reason, Apple opted to put a warning label on the iPod shuffle telling owners to not eat it. The company wouldn't do something like this unless some weirdo tried to eat one of them and failed.

9.Political Beliefs on Clothing Label

This label must have been created when George W. Bush was in office. Clothing labels are supposed to tell you how to wash the item without damaging it. This label (which was written in French, but made in the USA) takes the opportunity to warn the buyer that our president is dumb and the manufacturer had nothing to do with his election.

10.Don't Use Bad Language

Since when is it okay to tell someone what kind of language they should use on their own phone. This warning label is trying to help you spare the feelings of others. Instead of using curse words or offensive language, you should be nice and talk about rainbows and whiskers on kittens.

11.Hold your Chainsaw Right

If you hold a chainsaw by the moving blade, then you deserve what you get. Holding a chainsaw by the handle is common sense and if you don't have that, then you need to be banished to some unknown island. Even if you didn't read the label, there's enough horror movie villains that show us all how to hold a chainsaw right.

12.Dog Operating Car Label

If you own your very own dog named Brian Griffin then this warning label will make a lot of sense. If you have a normal dog that poops, pees and chasing cats, then you won't know what to do about this label. Dogs don't drive cars, so it's dumb to see any mention of an automobile would even be on a warning label for dog meds.

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